5
Oct

It all started with...

It all started with adoption papers,
or a c-section,
or labor and wailing your way into the world.

It all started with the first time we held you,
and the first time we saw you smile and make incredible eye contact.

It all started with you holding our finger, your entire hand wrapping around our one finger.
It all started with your little fingers and toes.

It all started with nerves and not knowing how to bathe,
or feed
or dress
little you.

It all started with parenthood,
it all started with you.

It all started with little,
little clothes,
little noises,
little cries,
little body,
little you.

It all started with doctor appointments and worrying about weight gain
and how much you ate,
and how much you pooed.

It all started with cries, and wails and getting to know and recognize your sounds.
It all started with finding our rhythm,
our dance,
our routine.

It all started easy,
or not.
It all started with sleeping babies,
or not.
It all started with confident parents,
or not.
It all started with good eaters,
or not.
It all started with happy,
or not.
It all started with feeling complete,
or not.
It all started with closeness,
or loneliness or
or feeling overwhelmed by love and comfort,
or not.

It all started with parenthood,
it all started with you.

It all started with doubts about your decisions,
it all started with noise.
It all started with tired, and wanting and accepting.

It all started with scars, and bumps,
and marks, and recovery.
It all started with bodies we no longer recognize,
but somehow love more.

It all started with smiles, and looking at you in wonder,
it all started with insecurities and having moments of not liking you!
It all started with love,
the kind that fixes the broken.

It all started with cries,
and tears falling down faces...
yours and mine.
It all started with frustrations,
and words that become regrettable...
yours and mine.
It all started with losing yourself in the chaos,
and tantrums...
yours and mine.

It all started with parenthood,
it all started with you.

It all started with weight.
The weight of you,
the weight of family,
the weight of love,
the weight of carrying you in my heart.

It all started with family,
and how you defined it,
how you made us one,
how you made walls into a home.

It all started with love,
it all started with childhood,
and second chances.
It all started with parenthood,
it all started with you.

Because we parent...
we love,
we snuggle,
we kiss away the hurt,
we give out hugs,
we try,
we cry...with you, for you, because of you,
we wring out more energy when there is none,
we never take a sick day,
we never give up,
we love through the difficult times,
we continue to find strength in all of it,
we lean on each other,
we teach,
we comfort,
we build...you, your character, your future,
we hold on to your heart,
we take care of it all,
we worry,
we age,
we stay up trying to get it all done,
we love...so much love,
we fight,
we won't give up on you.

And in the end, we will all remember how it all began.
Because it all started with you.

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