27
Feb

Five Minute Friday - peace

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on peace.

Go.

In 2021, I asked for peace and was met with quite the opposite.
Instead, I found a year of loss. So much sadness.
We found a year of loss and sadness and a year of us walking around crying.
We found a year of constantly trying to figure out what was happening.
No peace.

And then this week a war erupted and an entire world is wondering what is to come.
No peace, just worry, and concern.
Citizens have no idea what the night will bring. What tomorrow will look like.
No peace, just worry, and concern.

Deep, clean breath.
There is so much unknown, so focus on what we can clearly see.
There is so much to worry about, so focus on what brings a sense of calm.

Deep, clean breath.
Go for a walk and inhale.
Take a bath and exhale.
Take a yoga class and sink in.
Work out and shake it off.
Pet my puppy and feel love.
Hug your kids goodnight and linger.

After spending a year crying.
After spending a year upset.
After spending a year bouncing around.
Find a way to let peace in.
Find a way to heal your heart.
Find the peace we all need.

Stop.

20
Feb

I love how much you love your life

Every day and in every way, be more like Cole.

At night, you ask for both mom and dad to take turns snuggling. That's when you talk, and you gush.
You talk to dad about how excited you are for whatever the day after brings. You talk to him about how awesome specific parts of your day were. You talk about sports, you ask questions.
You talk to me about the best parts of your day, right down to the food you ate.
You ask me what the best parts of my day were. You ask me what made me laugh today, what did I do for someone, what made me smile.
We do our nightly traditions of I love yous. You won't let me leave until we exchange little guy kisses.
We talk about how much we love these moments, I realize how short-lived they will be, but for now, right now, we're here.
I love how much you love your life.

Every day and in every way, be more like Cole.

In the morning, you pack extra snacks for school, forever I thought they were for you because you love your food. Finally, I asked, are you really this hungry? No, I have friends that forget and we help each other out. One friend loves our fruit snacks so I always make sure I have extra for him.
You tell me stories of who brought in what and how you all shared. You tell me about how amazing this piece of fruit was, or this new thing you tried. You tell me about how thankful your friends are for each other, how it's become a cool little thing you all do. You beam, for the food, for the connection, for the chance to make friends and help each other out.
I love how much you love your life.

Every day and in every way, be more like Cole.

On the weekends, you are the first to rise. You get yourself ready, all to have time to play mine craft. You know if you get it all done and if you catch us when we're our most tired, we let it happen till we're up too.
By the time we come downstairs, your smile is ear to ear. You've let Pearl out, she's snuggled by you. In the winter, the fireplace is on and you're ready for your basketball game. In the spring, you have baseball equipment ready to go and your uniform is all set. And you can't help that smile. You're just so happy. You extend your arms, you ask how we slept, you start talking a mile a minute about a cool new thing you built in your house. Your heart is so full it comes rushing out.
I love how much you love your life.

Every day and in every way, be more like Cole.

On the court, in the field, you look so small to me. But damn kid, that heart of yours.
You are not the first one off the bench. But you are the most incredible team member.
You naturally know how to help, how to get excited, how to root people on.
I started noticing that in basketball when the other team, the team you are playing against, is shooting foul shots...miss or not, you high-five the player and I hear you say, you've got this.
When it's your team-mate, well, you're all in. Jumping up and down for every shot, giving them praise regardless.
And that one day when an entire team and gym was shouting your name, rooting for you to make a shot, mama lost her cool. The coach said I made him cry, but I think the truth is, you did. At the end of that game, we walked out together and I said to you that your heart had an entire gym cheering you on, wanting you to hit a shot. That I've never seen anything so amazing, and you just hugged me and wiped away your tears and mine and said, I'm proud of you too mom, and I'm proud to be yours.
I love how much you love your life.

Every day and in every way, be more like Cole.

When you are playing, the creativity is insane. The worlds you make up. The Legos you build, the crazy amount of noises you make. The battles you create. The games you make up. How you always prefer to play with someone but how you are also just fine on your own. The amount of pride that comes with showing off your creations. The smile and how you have a thousand words per minute because you can't get your story out fast enough.
I love how much you love your life.

Every day and in every way, be more like Cole.

From the little infant whose feet would dance when I fed him, to the little munchkin that hummed while he ate solids, to the little boy whose eyes lit up when he ate his first hotdog.
From the little blue-eyed boy that held a ball in his hands and would squeal with excitement, to the littlest man that loves sports.
From the teeny tiny human that looked at you like you were everything, the moon, the stars, the world, to the little guy that tells you that's exactly what you are.
From the little boy that needs his dad to the son that will always.
From the toddler that cried and broke when we said goodbye to Mia, to the little person that runs to take care of Pearl.
From the little boy that struggles to fall asleep because the world is just too cool to close your eyes, to the person that will always need one more thing before bed.
To the child that has his heart on the outside of his body which means it gets hurt more often.
To the one that thinks with his heart and your desire so he doesn't always learn a lesson, or know how to navigate a room.
To the boy that takes every single thing so literally and does not have an inside voice.
To the completion of our family puzzle, the one that is a lover of love.

Every and in every way, be more like Cole. Because I love how much you love your life.

18
Feb

Five Minute Friday - stretch

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on stretch.

Go.

In the morning.
To the limit.
During yoga.
To ease an ache.
Your mind, your thoughts.
What you are made of, what you are capable of.
S-T-R-E-T-C-H!

How many different ways can you interpret this word?
How many different directions can you take it?
I think the reason I made that list is...this is how I stretch myself.
It's how I deliver and how I sustain and how I am okay.

Although I am someone that always stretches to the limit, pushes myself, that works herself hard...
I have finally found a great sense of peace.
And yes, my peace looks different.
My peace is still hard-working, but nowhere near the person I was for so many years.
AND, I'm even coming down off the tension that stayed with me, years later.
I know I stretch myself, but no longer too thin.

And I have found it is still possible to be me...hard-working, loves to work, likes the drive, push yourself me...while also finding joy, comfort, peace, slowing down, and time.
I have found, you can be both...and this time, I won't lose my hum.

I stretch myself at the gym.
I keep up, I keep trying, I keep going.
I work hard, I feel good about that, and my body knows what it is capable of.

I stretch myself at my work.
I push our team, I push myself, I keep finding solutions.
And there are hard times, and I have realized that is when I need to back off, I need to back up, and I need to re-group.

I stretch my love.
That's what happens when you love hard and I love hard.
I love with all that I have.
I love with all that I am.

So, it is okay to stretch me...but no longer too thin.

Stop.

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