14
Jan

Five Minute Friday - determine

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on determine.

Go.

When you determine that it's time to move on.
When you determine that it's time to dig in.
When you determine that it's time to let love, life, laughter, and kindness back into your heart, your home.
When you determine your priorities and what you need to make come first.
When you determine what you want this life to look like, but as a parent, not just for you, but for your littles too.
When you determine what you want your life to look like because even as a parent, there is still a you, separate and apart from them.
When you determine what you want your work to look like.
When you determine what you want your marriage to be, how often that changes, and how you have to work on growing together, growing with, growing.
When you determine what you want to be spending your time on, and who you want to be spending it with.
When you determine you have to unravel a lot of your world so you can slowly, calmly, kindly, and gently...put it back together, this time with scars and cracks.

When you determine that life in your 40s is different and you are growing farther and farther away from that 20 something that was just there yesterday.
When you determine that the 30 something that helped build this life is also looking less recognizable.
Because life in your 40s IS different.
It comes with kids, not babies.
It comes with aging parents, and you in the middle like an awful sandwich.
It comes with magic you have to create, it's not just naturally there anymore, you have to make it happen.
It comes with second chapters and different careers and different life priorities.
It comes with determining that this is our life...right now...so what are we going to do with it?

Stop.

19
Dec

Five minute Friday - announce

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on announce.

Go.

Like so many, each year, I try and pick a phrase, a word, a guiding light for my year.
They have ranged from
More and less
Peace
All is calm, all is bright
Change and different

I have also tried different monthly additions, ad-ons, ways to connect.

This year, I'm landing on comfort and joy.

I'm not ready to talk to you yet 2021, it's coming, but I'm not ready today. I'm gathering up my thoughts on you and what you have brought. I'm trying to reconcile it all. I'm working on it. Because although so much happened in this year, and the pain, the heavy was so noticeable, I also need to remember that this is life. Life has pain which means it has joy which means it has love which means it has loss which means it has meaning.

So, I'll get there 2021...I'll get to a place where I can talk through our days together.

But, 2022, my hope and my wish, the reason I announce a phrase/word/saying/feeling/goal is because I need comfort and joy this year. I need laughter, I need snuggles, I need a little taking care of, I need a little hand-holding.

Please universe...hear my wish, please take this announcement and know that I am asking, I am in need.

Comfort and joy.

Stop.

12
Dec

Five Minute Friday - behold

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on behold.

It's a good time of year to take stock of all of the beauty in this world.
It's a good time of year to remember that we are all very lucky.
It's a good time of year to take a look around you and say...behold...

I have a loving family.
I have a dog that I get to see all day long.
I have a job that allows me to live well.
I have a home.
I see sunsets and rises.
I get to work out every day and move my body.

Behold...

I get to walk my puppy and she freaking loves it.
I get to spend my days with the love of my life.
I get to have my two babies still sleeping under my roof, in my home, walking up and wanting to be with me.
I get to make amazing traditions.
I get to introduce my daughter to amazing shows that I loved growing up.
I get to watch movies with my hubby.
I get to travel.

Behold...
I get to love and lose and hurt and cry and laugh and feel...feel all the feelings.
I get to embrace and smooch.
I get to hear music and dance.
I get to be.
I get to make misakes and be.

3
Dec

Five minute Friday - expectation

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on expectation.

Go.

I have unbelievably high expectations. I expect too much.
Out of myself.
Those that I love.
Those that love me.
My career.
My team.

I expect the love of my life to love me in a way that makes me feel loved.
I expect those that I work with to give their all with love.
I expect my family to have been there for me in the way that I needed.
I expect my friends to be framily and show up as I do - like the family I always wanted.
I expect my kids to be well behaved, respectful.
I expect myself to work hard.
I also expect myself to have balance.
I expect that I will set and meet goals.
I expect that I will work my body.
I expect that I will also be gentle on my body.
I expect that I will be a good parent, bride, friend, framily member.
I expect to be there for those that I love, always and forever kind of be there.
I expect to be a really good mom - nothing about perfect, but really good and always learning and trying.
I expect to take walks with my girl.
I expect to snuggle with my monkey little boy.
I expect a loving household, built on traditions and care.
I expect that love to seep out of all of us.

And damn, when expectations are not met, I do not respond well. I get hit really really hard. I fully and wholeheartedly take responsibility for my expectations being too high for people...almost difficult to meet too high. I fully and wholeheartedly take responsibility for my part and my crazy.

But I also know that with this comes a girl that loves deeply. Loves with all that she has because she doesn't know how else to love. There comes a girl searching, looking hard for what she feels she needs. There comes a girl that wants the best out of her family, but also gives them the room to make mistakes, grow, learn...kids so desperately need that. I know the part I play in this. I know how I set myself up to be let down. But I also know that to know me is to know true connection, true deep love. To know me means that I have let you in and I take that so seriously. I can either keep apologizing for who I am, I can keep trying to be different. I can keep saying that maybe it's possible for me to be different, or I can accept this part of me.

I set the bar high, I know. But if I am so willing to accept and love others, I have to start showing up for me in the same way.

Stop.

26
Nov

Five Minute Friday - nourish

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on nourish.

Go.

This was our 4th Thanksgiving hosting.
My husband could not be more into it. Getting the turkey perfect. Getting all the food just right. Getting everyone to compliment his work...he loves to host this one.
It's our 4th time bringing people together like this in our home.
Sometimes my side of the family, sometimes his, once just us four (thank you COVID).
And for this meal, the one that feels really grownup to host and cook, it is nourishing.

Necessary for growth.
Necessary for health.
Holding on to a feeling.
Holding on to a belief.

We've reached a stage in our lives where we realize how different every single year will look. We realize how big the littles are getting and how little time we have. We realize how much older our parents are getting and how little time we have left. We realize how much we are coming out of the fog of the harder years, and how much we hopefully still have to look forward to.

Our home is all I have ever wanted.
Welcoming, cozy, comfortable, able to hold many, a place to gather, a place to laugh, connect.

There is no better nourishment in this world.

Stop.

22
Nov

Five minute Friday - hide

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on hide.

Go.

As adults, especially as parents, sometimes all you want to do is run and hide.
Sometimes, you have to remind yourself that you are the adult in the room and that you aren't allowed to go anywhere.
Sometimes, you remember how confident and sure your parents were in their decisions, even when their decisions were so wrong, and you think, did they ever feel this way? Do other parents, do other parents?

There are some decisions that are so clear, so obvious.
There are others, that make your heart stop beating for a second and the world stop spinning because you do not know what to do.
There are some reactions that are so natural.
There are others that make you stop breathing because you realize you are being watched so you need to think about the look on your face, the emotion bubbling up.

I'm 42 years old.
I'm a mom to two wonderful kids.
I have a husband I have spent 21 years with.
I am a business owner after 20 very difficult years running an agency with all my heart and love.
I own a dog that I care too much about.
I have a lot to be grateful for.
I have a lot that bursts my heart open.

But, I am human. And those 20 difficult years, I wanted to put the blankets over my head and hide.
Those 21 years with my husband, many of them were spent in a fog of raising humans.
Those wonderful kids, they push buttons, they made you tired, want to run away and hide kind of tired.

But because of all we have done, all we continue to do, all that we are responsible for, I wake up every day.
I try.
I parent.
I love and I love hard.
I work.
I listen, I learn.

Because as much as we want to hide, eventually, we have to come back around and remember all we can do, is try and try again.

Stop.

14
Nov

Five minute Friday - wander

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on wander.

Go.

There is a saying..."those who wander are not lost".
But what happens when you are lost?
Lost and searching?
Lost and wandering?
Wandering and kind of hopeless.
What does one do with that?
You wander and you wonder.

It's another season of moving about with no purpose.
No direction.
No map or compass.
No way of seeing which way to go.
So you wander.
And you wonder.

You have no path.
You take twists and turns.
You just keep searching.
So you wander.
And you wonder.

And I am still surprised by those that know better.
The completely innocent.
The ones that see the best in all.
The ones that think of each direction and the ways to get there.
They do it with reason and heart.
They too wander, but they are not lost.
They don't wonder as much, they just know.

Stop.

8
Nov

Five Minute Friday - prayer

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on prayer.

Go.

It looks so different for so many.
For some, it is the traditional on your knees by your bedside.
For some, it is the even more traditional needing to be in a church.
For some, it is stepping outside, feeling nature wash over you.
For some, it is a yoga class and hearing the in and out of your breath.
For some, it is a bath, washing away the long day and getting back to who you are under it all.

For some, it brings peace.
For some, it brings a surrenduring.
For some, it brings an enlightening.
For some, it brings calm.
For some, it brings tears.

Some feel closer to their God.
Some feel closer to themselves.
Some feel connected to their family.
Some feel a purpose, a reason, their way.
Some feel connected to their past.
Some feel hope for their future.

Stop.

29
Oct

Five Minute Friday - morning

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on morning.

Go.

They look different now, but still my favorite time of day.

What was once a 4am wake up call to get me started on my never-ending workday is now a 6am workout class.

That never-ending workday has gone away too.

What was once a day I could not manage is now me in charge of how I spend my time, my mornings.

What was once just me, alone in the dark, is now still just me but after seeing them all off.

What was once a long highway commute is now a walk with the puppy, our favorite time of day.

What was once too early, is now just right.

What was once so stressful is now so different.

What was once a feeling of dread and a weight I could not carry, is now me lifting weights I never thought I would be able to.

What was once always rushing is slower now, more intentional, more realistic.

What was once leaving my home as quickly as I could, is now me loving the comfort of this place I love so much.

What was once my favorite time of day, still is, it's just different now.

Stop.

22
Oct

Five minute Friday - still (take 2)

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on still.

Go.

How am I still here?

The last time we had this word for FMF I wrote all about my yoga practice and finding stillness in my life.

But my life isn't as fast-paced these days. My change in careers, my lifestyle changes, COVID, have all led me to be calmer, more centered, more able to think. But the one thing that has taken a hit is my yoga practice and I struggle to hit the mat, alone in my room. It feels different these days. I still do it (because I'm a doer) but it doesn't bring me the same feeling, the same need, and I'm no longer pulled to it like I was in class.

How am I still here?

But something is brewing. Something that is leading me to feel sick to my stomach worried. Something is in the air and I'm concerned. I'm also tired. Like really really really tired. I wake up checking how quickly I can get back to bed. I want to nap all day every day. I've been here before.

How am I still here?

I try and rally around the wonderful things in my life. I am so fortunate and so so privileged. I try and remember that when things feel heavy like this but I have also decided it is okay to feel blue. So blue it is right now. Blue and tired and worn down and out a little. An author once wrote that it's important to feel all of your feelings so that you always know you can and will get to the other side. Just when you think, I can't do this anymore, it's good to remember you were here before, don't turn numb, feel it, go through it, it's the only way out is through.

I don't get told to feel my feelings often. I get told to bottle them a lot, that they are too big for this world. So I'm going to do this one differently.

Even if I feel them while sitting still.

Even if I feel them quietly and alone.

Even if I go through this alone.

How am I still here?

I'm still here because I need to be. Because I can be. Because I will be ok

I'm still here because this is life...glorious, messy, and hard life.

I'm still here because where else in the world would I be?

I'm still here because this is how it goes, some days great, some days not, some days ok, some days blue as hell.

I'm still here.

Stop.

Follow childhooodtake2!

Back to Top
Social Media Auto Publish Powered By : XYZScripts.com