31
Mar

Five Minute Friday - break

Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second-thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on break.

Go.

...when something breaks, something greater often emerges from the cracks. –NNEDI OKORAFOR

Oh, how I needed to hear this. Especially this week.
I went away for a very long time, after a very rough 18 months.
Everything broke.
No, that's not true, I broke everywhere.
...when something breaks, something greater often emerges from the cracks.

So, what is to emerge? What is to come? What happens after I break?
I pick up the pieces, I put myself back together and I emerge.

2023 is my year of self-respect and it is making me and others uncomfortable but I am leaning in.
I am finding my voice again while still not strapping on my fighting gloves - it's hard.
I am NO LONGER interested in proving I can do hard things - I have already proved it to myself over and over again. I am done.
I am trying very very very hard to lean into my "athletic body". JC talk about HARD!
I am no longer a lean person. I have a lot of muscle mass. I have a huge bum. I have curves now. I have a body of someone that lifts and I am trying SO hard to just be.
I am finding a different way to love and that's hard for me too.
I am working on me, like I've always done.
I am picking up my broken pieces.

I am falling madly and deeply in love with my hubby again.
I am reminded of who we were and our fog is lifting.
I am loving loving loving loving my babies.
Who are no longer babies but secretly, I will always call them my babies.
I am really finding my grove with both of you, and our "things" and holy hell, I am loving loving loving it.

I am emerging. I am picking up my broken pieces and I am emerging.

Stop.

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