Every Friday we unite for five minutes. Only five minutes, that's all we get, that's all we have. And then, right where we are, no edits or second thoughts, we publish those words. This week, we write on extra.
It's what I've been called so I finally just said it's what I am.
It's how I have spent the past three or more years defining myself.
Extra - too much - too big - too loud - too sensitive - too much.
It definitely did start when I was little.
I was the louder daughter.
I was more dramatic.
I rocked the boat.
I was so much, too much.
And then it carried on with others.
And so, I believed them all.
Extra - too much - too big - too loud - too sensitive - too much.
And now, in my 40s, the title fits too snug and so I retreated.
I went away.
I got as small as possible.
I curled up into the tightest of balls and I just took notice and took note and got even smaller.
I am hopeful that I will find a balance soon.
Somewhere between too much and not enough.
I am searching for me.
