Childhoodtake2!

I started a tradition several years ago - writing you a love letter on a day that celebrates mom-hood. Today, it continues...

I love watching you both play, either alone or together, your creative play is amazing.
Anna, you are engrossed in coloring and stitching and writing.
Cole, you are obsessed with building and cars and trains.
I love vacationing with you both.
I love watching how excited you get about our trips Anna.
You really do see them as wonderful adventures and you so look forward to all you get to see.
Cole, I love hearing you say "wow" in a light whisper, as the world unfolds around you.
I love it when you both hold hands, when you hug, when you are love.
I love it when you ask for a family hug.
Cole, even in your little three year old body, you know when we need it most.
Anna, I love hearing all about your day, I love our little talks.
I love running with you and our bike rides.
I love that we can take little swims together and how strong you are in the water.
I love watching you grow.
I still love our Friday nights, our Sunday mornings and I always will.
I love seeing you in PJs, fresh out of the tub, for some reason, it defines happychildhood.
I love how you smell, still able to smell like spring when you come in from playing, or soap once you get a tub.
I love how independent you are both becoming.
How I can count on you.
I love our goodnights. How gentle and loving and calm they are.
I love our reading dates, how close and quiet this time is.
Cole, I love hearing you ask if we can do a family story.
I love how important family is to you buddy.
I love hearing you call dad your best buddy.
I love seeing how much you need him in your life.
I love love love that you have calmed your emotions, and no longer cry all day long.
I adore how much you live to eat!
I love how much you love your life.
I love your laundry, because your clothes are still so so small.
I love seeing your shoes, because they are still reminders of how little you both are.
I love your memory.
I love your words.
I love you both.

Anna,
This year, you came back to me.
We came close to losing your spirit last summer and we found our way back to each other.
You thrive in love Anna, you need it to function.
Anger or
because I said so or
do this now or
yelling or
...
that is not how my stubborn girl takes in information.
You are me, you want to be part of the conversation and not told what to do.
You need reasons, why does it have to be like that, reasons.
You need to feel like you have a voice, like you can negotiate.
We are learning together and will continue to but you have taught us that love is the only conversation you are willing to have.
We are listening.

Cole, you have come out of your fog.
Which means you are maturing little man.
You are turning big boy four and you are ready.
Ready for a big boy bed, ready for big boy talks.
Ready for independence, ready for "I can and will do it".
Ready for leadership.
But, you still have a toddler voice, with big boy words.
Your voice is what I need right now.
It reminds me of little sweet love.
And your adorable curls that stick to your forehead while you sleep.
I love how your body curls into mine when I scoop you up.
Oh, how I love your hugs.
Because no matter what you do sweet love, you are all in.
Eat, hug, smooch, play, scream, cry...
you never dip your toe.
It is all or nothing.

Thank you both for finding me.
Thank you for creating and giving me motherhood.
Thank you for your wisdom, your love.
Thank you for reminding us both to always choose love.
Thank you for believing in family.
Thank you for being two of the best people I know.
And most of all,
thank you for having me believe in happy endings
and love at first sight.
Thank you for defining family.